We firmly believe that the importance of good nutrition in the development of children and teens cannot be overstated! Numerous studies have shown that the dietary habits of children and teens can affect their physical growth, cognitive development, and mental well-being. Nutrition is a crucial part of childhood development for both child and adults. Read on to learn more about how what you feed your children or teen impacts their lives now and in the future.

65% of brain cells are made from fat. Iron deficiency during pregnancy has been linked with low IQ levels later in life. Calcium deficiencies have been associated with poor muscle tone as well as weakened bones. Protein intake is needed for proper growth at all stages throughout childhood.

The role of nutrition in the development of children and teens remains important because nutrition is a process where the body uses nutrient to sustain life. More so, our body uses the nutrient to keep it healthy as we learnt from our series on my child their nutrition.

Nutrition Needed For Development of Children and Teens

The problem many parents face is that it can be difficult for them to know what those nutritional needs are and how best to meet them. This blog series, will help you gain better understanding the role nutrition plays in your child’s development.

By staying connected and reading this blog post and series, you’ll learn about some common questions related to childhood nutrition including why kids need certain nutrients at different stages of life. How much protein or vitamins kids require and whether supplements are necessary; and how diet impacts behaviour and cognitive development.

Nutrients That Are Important

There are different types of nutrients that are important to a growing children and teens development. Although, there has been increased awareness about the importance of a healthy diet for children and teens, it is still difficult to find information that is both practical and easy to understand. Many parents are still uncertain about what constitutes a balanced diet for their child or how much food they should be eating at different ages.

In this blog series, we aim to provide answers to the common questions by exploring various aspects of childhood nutrition. Topics such as types of nutrients that are important in developing children; recommended daily intakes (RDIs) for energy, protein, fat and carbohydrates.

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Emem Iniobong, CCC is a Canadian Certified Counsellor in Brandon, Manitoba. She specializes in working with children and adolescents experiencing various mental, behavioural, and emotional challenges.

Transitioning from one from activity to another activity is a problem for many children and sometimes can be a trigger for tantrums or meltdown. Transitioning includes everything from getting up in the morning all the way to going to bed at night.  There are so many ways that parents and caregivers can help children with transitioning from one thing to another. This blog post will provide strategies for parents on how they can help their kids transition better through various aspects of the day such as making sure the bedroom is calm and dark before trying to sleep or using an agenda planner when scheduling time with friends or family members so that transitions are less stressful.

1. Create routines to Help Children with Transitioning

Transitioning can be rough in any circumstance, but when a child wants to transition from one activity or game to another the process shouldn’t feel like it takes twice as long because there’s no structure. Creating routines will help break down your child’s time so they know what to expect and look forward to. This detailed guide covers how you can implement routine-making for feeding, getting dressed, baths and bedtime so that transitioning becomes not only easier on your family but also develops positive a habit before life is fraught with stress too!

2. Use Visual Cue to Help Children with Transitioning

The use of visual cue to help children in transition can be beneficial to children. Whether you are using a visual timer or visual schedule, the child know what to expect as it is very clear and makes transitioning from one activity to the next activity ease activities or if there’s an interruption in their day.

3). Use Transition Song

Using a transition song can really be effective for younger children because there’s no better way to get a child ready for the next activity than by using transition songs. The use of song helps the child prepare to move to the next activity because they know it is time for another activity. This is an opportunity for parent and caregivers to be creative with their choice of song to use for transitioning. With many children able to sing along with these popular “clean up tune”, getting them out to the next activity will be quick or entertaining.

4). Give Extra Time to Help Children with Transitioning

Giving extra time when transitioning a child can be very beneficial for children. Parent and caregiver do not leave things till the last minute and then asking your child to transition to the next activity can be trigger behaviours.

Emem Iniobong, CCC is a Canadian Certified Counsellor in Brandon, Manitoba. She specializes in working with children and adolescents experiencing various mental, behavioural, and emotional challenges.  Passionate about helping children and teens find their unique strengths, she develops skills, so they can overcome whatever challenges they face and bravely navigate the world around them.

Dealing with tantrum is a concern for most parents/caregivers. In our first in this blog series we met our guest, Moyin Adefisayo who is currently a graduate student of the Masters of Art in counselling psychology program at Yorkville University. She works with the Vancouver School Board as a Student Support Staff (Urgent Intervention Process Team). Moyin provides behavioural plans to educators (K-12) and works with the child in developing coping strategies to managing their emotions and/or behaviours.

We learned that everyone has behaviour and behaviours are signals. They communicate and also have a function and as such, it is very important to know and understand what these are to support your child or teen.

In this second part of three we look at tantrums; how they may differ and how to handle them.

What is a Tantrum?

Like we mentioned in the last blog everyone has behaviour. Tantrum is a way children and youth express frustration, stress, or anger. Keep in mind that they do not make a conscious plan to embarrass you. Rather, a tantrum could happen as a result of learned behaviour or as a result of stress. Tantrum is a functional behaviour and if you understand what the function of that tantrum is then you will know how to respond. Some tantrums could be manipulative or stressed related.

Manipulative Tantrum

Manipulative tantrum is when your child uses the learned behaviour (tantrum) to get something from you (ha-ha). Children are really smart and at a young age they already know how to get something or gain control over you. When your child knows what to expect and what is expected from them the tendency to use manipulative tantrum will be reduced. This is where being consistent is key.

Stress Tantrum

Stress tantrum could be as a result of your child feeling stressed or a build up of stress that results in the unwanted behaviour. It could also be as a result to emotional response which could include anger, frustration, sadness, and so on. Remember, behaviours are signals! The parent or caregiver needs to discern if the tantrum is stressed related. Then, they must be in tuned with his or her child to know what that behaviour is communicating.

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Emem Iniobong, CCC is a Canadian Certified Counsellor in Brandon, Manitoba. She specializes in working with children and adolescents experiencing various mental, behavioural, and emotional challenges. I am passionate about helping children and teens find their unique strengths, develop skills to overcome challenges, and bravely navigate the world around them.

My child, their behaviour sounds common in many homes today. As a mental health counsellor, one common question I get from parents and caregivers is how do I deal with my child’s behaviours or tantrums? How do I respond to my child’s behaviour? Why is time out not working for my child? Why does my child meltdown a lot? What do I do to handle my child’s outbursts, as I am exhausted?

In this 3 week blog series we have a guest speaker who will joining us as we look into and discuss the topic of my child, their behaviour.

Meet Our Guest

Moyin Adefisayo is currently a graduate student of the Masters of Art in counselling psychology program at Yorkville University. She works with the Vancouver School Board as a Student Support Staff (Urgent Intervention Process Team). Moyin provides behavioural plans to educators (K-12) and works with the child in developing coping strategies to managing their emotions and/or behaviours. Referral into the urgent intervention process team is through the Vancouver School Board and the length of interventions for each child range from 1-4 weeks.

What is Behaviour?

Behaviour is simply the way people handle or conduct themselves. These ways or conduct could involve their functioning, reactions, and actions in response to their daily functioning or everyday living. It is safe to say everyone has a behaviour and this behaviour, especially in children, serves a purpose! It can be either functional or communicative.

Behaviour as a Function in My Child, Their Behaviour

It is important to know and understand what purpose the behaviour serves in order to effectively decrease the undesired behaviour and replace it with a desired behaviour. When the function of the behaviour is known that is easy to understand what your child is trying to communicate.

Behaviour as Communicative in My Child, Their Behaviour

Behaviour as communicative in my child is important to know. When parents understand what the purpose of a behaviour is and what it’s trying to communicate they are better equipped to handle the situation.

Tips on How to Handle My Child, Their Behaviour

• Be in tune with your child
• Establish good rapport
• Have Clear Expectation
• Offer Choices
• Follow Through
• Be Consistent

Parents and caregivers need to remember that behaviour is a signal and as such it is important to know and understand what is the need? What is my child trying to communicate and what is the function? I hope you found this blog helpful. Share with others you know may need this info and do not forget to follow us on all our social media.

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Emem Iniobong, CCC is a Canadian Certified Counsellor in Brandon, Manitoba. She specializes in working with children and adolescents experiencing various mental, behavioural, and emotional challenges. I am passionate about helping children and teens find their unique strengths, develop skills to overcome challenges, and bravely navigate the world around them.

Supporting teen with anxiety during Covid-19 has been stressful for stressful. How do I support my teen with anxiety during this Covid-19, has been a huge stressors in parents and caregivers. Parents and caregivers are so stressed because during this pandemic is really difficult for them to support their teen with anxiety.

I have heard teens tell me I just want Covid-19 to go away, and my anxiety will go as well. Teens have said to me, I do not want the school to be shut down again as I don’t want to be alone at home without connecting with my friends. Teens have also said when school goes remote I struggle because I do not have any motivation to learn.

This is the new reality that the world leaves in right now. One day is we are free to connect with family and friends and the next day is you cannot visit friends and families; it leads to anxiety because teens do not know what to expect. Research indicates that the rate of anxiety in teens have increased during this Covid-19.

How do I support my teen with anxiety during this Covid-19 is a common question among parents and caregivers.

1) Limit Worry Activities

You know that teens with anxiety are prone to worry a lot and as a parent or caregiver limiting those worry activities or exposures are important in supporting teens with anxiety during this Covis-19. Some ways to support your teen to limit worry activities with anxiety during Covid-19;

• Limit their exposure to media that focus so much on the negative outcomes especially when you know your teen worries a lot. Limiting media will include you as a parent or caregiver been intentional around your teen to limit media exposure.
• Ask your teen what the know or if they have any question that is causing them to worry a lot and use that opportunity answer their questions in an age appropriate way. Please parents avoid details answers that can cause more worries in your teen.
• Validate their feelings, emotions, and thoughts around the situation. Do not be in a hurry to dismiss their feels or worries, be patient and explore and validate your teen. (read more on this topic here).

2) Keep Routine “Normal”

Keep the routine normal and consistent to support teen with anxiety during Covid-19 as it helps teens feel safe, develop life skills, cope with the situation, and build healthy habits. Routine could include bedtime, physical activities, spiritual activities, connecting with loved ones (friends, families, teacher, religious leader etc., through video chat or phone call), schoolwork, appointments, medical professional, and fun with family. Keeping routine normal and consistent in supporting teens with anxiety during Covid-19 can help reduce stress, worry, and anxiety.

3) Connect with Your Supports

Connecting with your supports in other to support your teen with Anxiety during Covid-19 is very important. For a lot of people that support could include;

• Professional Supports. Professional supports could include your family doctor, mental health professional, or school counsellor.
• Spiritual Supports. Spiritual supports could include your pastor, church, and so on.
• Community Supports. The Community supports could include groups in the communities, online group, and so on.

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Emem Iniobong, CCC is a Canadian Certified Counsellor in Brandon, Manitoba. She specializes in working with children and adolescents through various mental, emotional, and behavioural challenges.  Passionate about helping children and teens find their unique strengths, she developed tools so they can overcome whatever challenges they face and bravely navigate the world around them. Bliss Counselling and Wellness Centre helps you find your bliss.

Knowing different ways of calming anxiety in children can be helpful for parents and caregivers.

In this series of mental health tips, one common question from parents and caregivers was how can I calm my teen when they worry a lot and how can I calm my children when they are stressed.

In this blog, I will be providing some easy tips around calming anxiety in your children. However, keep in mind that the tips provided in this blog can be helpful for both young and older adults.

1). 54321 Grounding Exercise as a Way of Calming Anxiety in Children

This 54321 grounding exercise is a common and popular exercise as a way of calming anxiety in children but in most cases is not used as they are supposed to be used. This 54321 grounding exercise for calming anxiety in children involves uses the five senses to help children remind them of the present. This is a 54321 grounding exercise can help calm anxiety in children and get through stressful or hard situations.

2). Paper, Pencil, and Crayon

Having paper, pencil, and crayon have been effective in my practice in calming anxiety in children. Coloring has the potential to calm anxiety in children, reduce anxiety, build skills, create focus, healthy ways of managing emotions, and bring about more mindfulness.

3). Puzzles as a Way of Calming Anxiety in Children

Puzzles can serve as a great tools to calm anxiety in children because they can have an instant calming effect in children who are stressed, overexcited, anxious, or having a tantrum. Using puzzles as a calming strategies in children can help in concentration, hand-eye coordination, fine motor skills, self-esteem, memory, problem solving skills, and spatial awareness (where the child is aware of them in a space and how the objects relates to each other and them).

4). Fidget Toys for Calming Anxiety in Children

Parents/Caregivers keep fidget toys handy for children or even adults (hahahaha) and yes, you heard me right to hold in their hands to calm an anxious or stressed child. Fidget toys help with the child, teen, or adult focus and pay attention.

5). Imagining a Favourite Place or Activity

Asking the child or teen to imagine a favourite place or favourite activity can help to reduce anxiety in children. Asking the child or teen to say the place loud, describe it, and the feelings they are experiencing has a way to calm down an anxious or stressful child.

6). Stress Balls for Calming Anxiety in Children

Stress Balls are tools that I have laying in my office all the time. Like the fidget toys it helps the child or teen and sometimes the parents and caregivers focus and pay attention because of the feel in their hands.

7). Trampoline for Calming Anxiety in Children

Trampolines are great for movement in reducing anxiety in children and also a great tool calm an overexcited child or teen. You can go wrong with this tool.

8). Using Floppy Teddy Bear or Toys

Using floppy teddy bear or toys is a great tool to calm stress or anxiety in children. When using this strategy asks the child or teen to describe the color, feel, how they smell, and so on can help in calming the child and also create focus and attention.

Emem Iniobong, CCC is a Canadian Certified Counsellor in Brandon, Manitoba. She specializes in working with children and adolescents through various mental, emotional, and behavioral challenges.  Passionate about helping children and teens find their unique strengths, she develop skills so they can overcome whatever challenges they face and bravely navigate the world around them. Emem owns Bliss Counselling and Wellness Centre whose mission is to help you find your bliss and live confidently.

Connecting with your teen as a parent is very vital in your relationship with your teen. However, as simple as it sounds or appears parents find it is difficult to connect with their teens. One of the questions I got asked by parents is how do I connect with my teen.

The teenage years are an intriguing one that is full of changes for both the teen and the parent. The changes in teens include physical, emotional, changes in their brain that influences their emotions, judgments, and decision-making, and at the same time becoming independent and developing their identity. With all the changes happening with the teen, they sometimes can come across as rude, emotional, angry, snobbish, and so on. They will sometimes push your bush as a parent and might appear to have higher regards for their friends than you and your family. They may also not want to talk with you or listen to you which can be frustrating and challenging as a parent.

Take a deep breath!

In this blog, I will be providing some tips on how to connect with your teen.

1). Do not use words like “let’s talk” when Connecting Your Teen.

When connecting with your teen, parents avoid questions like let’s talk because it sends the wrong alert to their brain, “what have I do or what did I not do” which makes them defensive and on edge. Instead, look for moments to strike up conversations in a relaxed manner.

2). Timing is very Important when Connecting with Teen.

When connecting your teen pay attention to if that is the right time and space to connect with your teen. As parent, you know your teen better than anyone and as such, knowing when to best approach your teen is very important and vital when trying to connect with your teen.

3). Do not take it personally.

Like, I mentioned early in this write-up, teen can come up as been rude, angry, and so on, and so like their attitude and some things they say. When trying to connect with your teen do not take things personal, and I know you might say really? Yes, a lot of things might be going on for your teen and sometimes when you get talking then you realize there were not trying to be rude, but just expressing their attitude or behaviour in a wrong way.

4). Listen when Connecting with Your Teen.

Listen, Listen, Listen. As much as it sounds easy especially when you are not interested but in other to connect with your teen, parent you need to genuinely listen and be interested in what your teen is saying because this stage of their life a lot of things are happening that they don’t have answer for and as such it is important to listen and follow your teen lead in other to connect with your teen.

5). Just Connect.

When connecting with your teen do things that your teen care about, interested, and loves doing. These activities could include but not limited to playing video games, going for walks, doing chores together, go for a trip, or watching their show with them, going on dates. Look for ways to connect with your teens.

Hopefully, these tips will provide a launching pad for you in connecting with your teen, especially in this their critical stage of life. Let me know what work, did not work, and some other things you are doing that is not on this list.

Emem Iniobong, CCC-Q is a Canadian Certified Counsellor in Brandon, Manitoba. She specializes in working with children and adolescents through various mental, emotional, and behavioral challenges.  Passionate about helping children and teens find their unique strengths, she develop skills so they can overcome whatever challenges they face and bravely navigate the world around them. Bliss Counselling and Wellness Centre helps you find your bliss.

Teen Suicide can be preventable if the risk factors, warning signs, and steps to protect your teen are known. Is your teen at risk for suicide? Are you worried and overwhelmed about your teen or anyone else? Then have that sincere conversation with your teen or reach out to professional in your community. Brandon here has a lot of resources that you can reach out to.

What Makes a Teen Vulnerable for Suicide?

Hmm, with all the changes happening in your teen at this stage of their lives, there are a lot of things that can make a teen vulnerable for suicide. Mental health conditions such as poor coping with the daily stressors of being a teen, relationship issues, rejection, family issues, failure, and breakup are something that can make teen vulnerable as they do not see the bigger picture and just thinking of a permanent response.

What Makes a Teen at Risk for Suicide?

As mentioned above, a teen can be at risk for suicide because of the circumstance in their life. Things that could increase the risk of suicide for teen includes;

• Teen who have mental health disorder such as depression and alcohol and drug use may be at risk for suicide.
• Teens that are feelings of worthlessness and hopelessness that is associated with depression may be at risk for suicide.
• Teen that are been bullied may be at risk for suicide.
• Teen that has the history of sexual abuse, physical abuse, and emotional abuse may be at risk for suicide.
• Teen has attempted suicide in the past.
• Teen who struggles with gender identity and/or sexuality orientation with no supportive family or community may be at risk for suicide.
• Teens with family history of depression and suicide may be at risk for suicide.
• Teen who lack support networks, poor relationships with parents or peers, and feelings of social isolation may be at risk for suicide.

What are Warning Signs that Your Teen is Suicidal?

Some warning signs that your teen is suicidal may include;

• Teen is talking about suicide or writing suicidal note of not wanting to be around anymore.
• Teen is talking about feeling hopelessness and trapped in a situation.
• Teen is withdrawing from family or friends.
• Teen has loss their desire to favorites things they had loved doing before
• Teen has increased their alcohol or drug used.
• Teen giving their possession or belongings away.
• Changes in teen’s sleeping and eating habit
• Changes in teen’s mood
• Teen engages in self-destructive behaviour

What Can I do As a Parent or Caregiver?

• Watch and Listen to what your teen is saying. Do not assume you know what your teen is saying. Listen, be patient, and observe what your teen is saying and not saying.
• Ask your teen questions. Use open-ended question instead of using closed-ended question that results in a ‘yes or no’
• Ask for Help. Reach out to family, religious leader, friends, your family doctor, or a mental health professional for help. Please, reach out.

Emem Iniobong, CCC-Q is a Canadian Certified Counsellor in Brandon, Manitoba. She specializes in working with children and adolescents through various mental, emotional, and behavioral challenges.  Passionate about helping children and teens find their unique strengths, she develop skills so they can overcome whatever challenges they face and bravely navigate the world around them. Emem owns Bliss Counselling and Wellness Centre whose mission is to help you find your bliss and live confidently.

Self-harm and teen will be our focus for this blog as we continue in our series of how I know my teen needs counselling or what are some signs that I need to access counselling for teen. When you have a teen that self-harm it can be overwhelming and sometimes even scary, so here are so things to know about self-harm and teen;

What is Self-Harm?

As explained in one of blog, when your teen tries to hurt themselves on purpose with no intention of committing suicide or when your teen involves in risky behaviours that hurt them without any feeling the pain.

What is the Cause of Self-Harm in Teens?

Self-harm can be a way your teen is coping with stress, managing difficult emotions, express internal feeling through cutting, as a form of distractions from painful emotions, punished for perceived faults, a way of communicating their pain to others, or as a way to feel something especially if they feel empty or norm.

What are the Signs that your Teen is Self-Harming?

Some signs that your teen may be self-harming may include surface cutting or scratches, hitting or banging their heads or something punching themselves, burnt (cigarettes), abusing their medication but not to the point of suicide, or picking their skins with sharp objects and so on.

Who is at Risk for Self-Harm?

The research shows that self-harming are common between teenagers and young adult. The research also indicates that self-harm is common in girls and young women than males. Some reason why a teen may be at risk to self-harming includes; mental health issues (ex. Anxiety, depression, borderline personality disorder, eating disorders, and so on.), traumatic events (such as sexual abuse), alcohol or drug use, peers that self-harm, and so on.

What can I do as a Parent to help my Teen and Self-Harm?

• Be clam and talk with your teen about self-harm. Really? I just remain calm and how is that possible? I know it can be overwhelming and scaring when you know your teen is self-harming. However, remaining calm and engaging in an open-ended question without judgment about how they are feeling and the behaviours they have noticed that leads to their actions. Let you teen know you care about them, acknowledge their feelings and let them know they are listened too and it can build trust.

• Get Professional Help with self-harm and your teen. Get professional help for your teen that is self-harming is importance because you as a parent can learn to understand why your teen is self-harming, how to support your teen, and your teen will learn how to cope using healthy way and heal.

• Provide Emotional Support for your teen. Providing emotional support to your teen during this process is very vital. Be involved as parent in the process; spend time with your teen, be patient with your teen and understand that treatment takes time, help your teen come up with a plan of things that triggers, places, things, and people they can call when they feel overwhelmed.

Emem Iniobong is a Brandon MB, Canadian Certified Counsellor that helps children, teens, young adults, parents, and families in dealing with anxiety, depression, grief, parenting support to live a more fulfilled and bliss-ful life.

7 tips to get your teen to sleep more is vital for the teen’s health. One common issue with teens I see is lack of sleep or sleep deprivation and as parent know it is really difficult to get a tired teen out of bed. According to the Canadian Pediatric Society the recommend hours of sleep for 13- to 18-year-olds is 8 to 10 hours per night. However, statistics shows that more than half of Canadian teens get much less, about 6.5 to 7.5 hours per night and that is not surprising given the teens that I see and how many hours of sleep they disclose. As noted in one of my blog post, sleep deprivation has been linked to mood swings; drop in school performance, poor eating habits, reduced cognitive function, and difficulties concentrating. As such, it’s important to pay attention to your teen’s schedule.

Nonetheless, changes in hormones, technology, schoolwork, extracurricular activities, and so on could cause sleep deprivation in teen. And as such parent needs to pay attention.

Some ways that parents and caregivers can help their teen get more sleep includes;

Tip 1: Make it a priority and take a stand.

Set clear limits with regards to study and sleep and make it a priority so your teen understand and know how to manage their time. Keep in mind that they may not like the decision but in the long run it will pay off.

Tip 2: Be Consistent to Get Your Teen more Sleep.

Parents and caregivers be consistent and encourage consistency with your teens. Stick to the routine and the sleep schedule but weekdays and weekends. In sticking to the routine and schedule on the weekends you could be flexible.

Tip 3: Avoid Napping to Get Your Teen more Sleep.

Discourage your teen from taking a nap at any time of the day as that could hinder them from sleeping on time.

Tip 4: Limit Screen Time to Get Your Teen more Sleep.

One hour minimum before bedtime all screened should be turned off. However, if a teen have a homework that needs the internet then I would suggest they do it early on in the day and not close to bedtime.

Tip 5: Bed for Sleep Only

Make bed for sleep only and not for eating or watching TV because then it will be associated with sleeping rather than eating or watch TV as suggested by experts.

Tip 6: Discourage Food/Snacks/Drinks

Discourage your teen from eating big meals, snacking, and drinking drinks with caffeine before bedtime as this could hinder your teen from sleeping and could be harmful.

Tip 7: Professional Consult

Seek professional consultation if your teen continues to struggle with sleep and it is impacting their functioning. One of the most common sleep problems with teens is insomnia, which is chronic difficulty in falling asleep or staying asleep and can interrupts the teens functioning. Cognitive Behavioral Therapy for Insomnia (or CBT-I) is the most effective treatment for insomnia.

Emem Iniobong, CCC-Q is a Canadian Certified Counsellor in Brandon, Manitoba. She specializes in working with children and adolescents through various mental, emotional, and behavioral challenges.  Passionate about helping children and teens find their unique strengths, she develop skills so they can overcome whatever challenges they face and bravely navigate the world around them. Bliss Counselling and Wellness Centre mission is to help you find your bliss and live confidently.